If it's not one thing, it's two things...

ObamaMercial

2008-10-30T13:03:00.003-06:00

So the Obama infomercial thing has come and gone. I must say, I was a fan. Many people enjoyed it more than I did, but I think that's understandable. I've already reached a point where my research about him and his policy positions (and even the shortcomings thereof) mean that his speeches don't impact me as much as they might otherwise.

That being said, the vignettes featured in the half-hour program were poignant and did a good job connecting with "heartland" voters. There's this illogical idea that somehow values voters are only those who turn to the church before all else -- but Obama helped to show that values voters are regular people, not just the bible thumpers. Moms who care about kids, husbands who care about their wives, wives that care about their families, teachers who care about everyone -- these are the real value voters, and the people Obama aims to help the most.

I actually thought the vignettes could have been longer. The editor did a good job cutting footage to create the story, but they felt short. I felt like I wanted to hear more about the stories of these people long after their segment had ended. At the same time, throughout the ad I found myself excited for the live event at the end only to be disappointed with it when it came about. It was just the usual Obama speech we've seen time and time again. I really thought they could have done without the live portion, but it didn't necessarily take away from the piece as a whole.

There are those who think all his commercials put him on our television screens too much, but from what I'm hearing from my little sample of the voting public while we're ready for this political season to be over (and yes, we really are) we don't necessarily get tired of seeing Obama. We get more comfortable with him, and pieces like last night's ObamaMercial help give comfort to Undecided voters all across the country.

I'm looking forward to waking up next Wednesday morning. I'm not buying victory cigars yet, but I'm checking out brands.

7 years ago today

2008-09-11T06:56:00.002-06:00

7 years ago today I was woken up by a friend from across the hall in my dorm because some people from a rogue group flew a plane into one of the tallest buildings in America, and he didn't have a television to watch this horrible story unfold. Before long, some people from a rogue group flew a second plane into the other tall building, a plane reportedly headed for the White House crashed into a field in PA, a plane allegedly hit the Pentagon, the tall buildings collapsed and thousands of Americans (and some non-Americans) were dead. The members of the rogue group were almost all Saudi, led by a US trained and formerly US funded militia leader (also Saudi) who was installed to defeat an intangible form of government in its physical form of the Soviets in Afghanistan many years previous. 7 years later we have not caught him, have scaled back our efforts to find him, and have instead started an unfounded war and tortured people in a country almost 1000 miles away from the country where that US trained and formerly US funded Saudi is most likely thought to reside. We also haven't so much as had a quiet word with the Saudis over what their rogue citizens have done. Think of it like this: In 2021 a group of rogue Americans hijack a jet and fly it into the Burj Al-Arab in Dubai. The UAE spend the next five years invading Canada and torturing citizens, eventually leaving 50,000+ dead.

How does that make any sense? This is a crucial time for America when our President has not made us safer, or really kept us safe at all and has done his best to make the world more dangerous for Americans. We have one candidate for President who wants to "stay the course" when it's clearly worked so well for us thus far, and one candidate who wants to shift our battle to catch the US trained and formerly US funded militia leader who started this debacle in the first place, and then stop invading sovereign nations (which only helps to make more terrorists) and work on repairing the cracks in our own country.

Honestly, which one sounds like the best for America? (and if the fucking Republicans can use 9/11 for political purposes, so can I. So GFY.)

McCain's VP choice is a gimmick

2008-08-29T14:08:00.002-06:00

Wow! So in the span of about 2 hours I went from sitting on my couch having a glass of water and posting an iReport video, to having it shown on CNN, having it posted to the CNN homepage, and later this afternoon I will be doing a live call-in on CNN International. (7p Eastern, 5p Mountain should you get that channel.) In 4 hours since I've posted the video, it's had over 80,000 views.

Thanks to everyone who is stopping by as a link from my CNN iReporter profile.

I just wanted to take a minute to better flesh out what I'm saying about Sarah Palin as McCain's VP choice.

She absolutely deserves congratulations, there is ZERO doubt about that. It is, hands down, an historic choice.

Many comments on my video have started with the inexperience arguments. I don't want to make that one quite yet, even though I briefly mentioned in my video. The larger point is that the only way to view this pick is as a political gimmick. When Hillary Clinton was not chosen as the Vice President, Republican strategists clearly picked that as an opportunity to steal disgruntled voters. McCain is just trying to bait voters into voting for his ticket because he has a woman on it. This has zero other motivation than she's a woman.

This is clearly a political gimmick. It's as simple as that. If she were a man with these qualifications, she never would have been chosen. That alone shows that all McCain is doing is playing a political game. He thinks American's are dumb, and that those who wanted to see a woman in the White House wanted it simply because she was a woman, and that's not the case. Clinton Supporters were such because they supported her as a strong woman, AND her policies. Sarah Palin could not be farther from Hillary Clinton as a politician.

It makes me sad. John McCain thinks that America is stupid and will fall for this. He doesn't care about making our country better, he just cares about getting votes so he can get to the White House. He said it himself in his own books, he has the ambition to be President and that's why he's running. It's unfortunate, we need better than political gimmicks and a candidate who only wants to play games at such a trying time as this for our country.

Olympic Mettle

2008-08-15T13:05:00.005-06:00

I've been hearing an awful lot about the medal race between China and the United States, and a lot of griping about judging in different sports, and dominance of certain athletes in certain categories. (ahem, michael phelps, and the chinese "women's" gynmastics team.)

And while that's all well and good, we have to remember that it's not all about dominating. In some respects it's become almost jingoistic. I understand the problems some people have with things, especially with the judging of some of the women's gymnastics, and I fully fully believe the IOC should be investigating the Chinese possible use of underage girls. The IOC investigates possible cheating in the form of doping, why should they not investigate this form of rules breaking?

But I digress. Let us not forget the point of these games: recognizing the amazing feats of human ability. HUMAN ability. Yes it's nice to get some national pride by a swimmer (or gymnast or martial artist or whatever,) beating the competition, but why aren't we satisfied with how amazing they are in general? Yes Alicia Sacramone screwed up, it happens. But she still owns a silver medal. Do you? No, you don't. She's still a gymnast that's 1,000x better than 99.99% of the rest of the WORLD. She can say, without question, that she is better at what she does than more than six and a half billion people. Why can't that be great in and of itself? Why do we have to bitch about judging and complain that we should have been the best but we weren't? She's still absolutely AMAZING. They all are. Whoever finished last in gymnastics? They're amazing too.

Whoever finished last in kayaking? Whoever finished last in table tennis? Whoever finished last in the most obscure summer olympic sport? They're all amazing. Every single person who went there and competed with no other help than their natural ability is an absolutely amazing person.

I especially want to take a second to recognize the athletes who have won first ever medals for their countries. Yes, I'm aware I just railed about the unfortunate nature of jingoism and excessive national pride in the Olympics, but that mostly applies to the countries who are head and shoulders above others in the medal count every two years. We should take time to really point out these feats, and recognize athletes from countries like Mongolia and India who represent considerable Olympic spirit and have finally seized their opportunities and have won their first gold medal, or in some cases first ever medal.

How must that feel? The first ever person in history from an entire country who has won an Olympic medal. That's national hero stuff, right there. It really makes me want to put aside petty differences, illegal occupations, and shake hands with someone different than me. Could you imagine what we could do if we constantly possessed the best in Olympic spirit all the time?

These people are amazing. Let us not forget that.

Yahoo Fails

2008-07-31T14:54:00.001-06:00

Sometimes even Yahoo fails. (and we're not talking about stocks here.)

Unemployment Update

2008-07-23T16:06:00.002-06:00

Nearly a month after I was let go, my old boss is finally sending me a check for the $3300 in back pay I'm owed. About fkn time. Give it another week and according to Colorado State Law, I'm entitled to recouping up to 150% of my total unpaid earnings.

Or something like that. I didn't read the form fully.

There are 17+ resumes sent out and only one call back. That job only pays $12 an hour, and they've said they can't budge on that. I told them I'd call them back and let them know after I do some math, if I think it'll be worth either of our time to pursue the opportunity with each other any further.

But here's my question -- why are companies so bad about calling people back? So many places explicitly say no phonecalls, so how am I supposed to follow up? I should skip the middleman and just throw my resumes directly into the trash. Because it honestly seems like people just get resumes, and never do anything with them. I'm skilled, I have a bunch of experience -- both specialized and diverse, so I know that I'm a desirable employee to at least SOME outlets...yet I never hear jack shit.

So hear I am during the fourth week of unemployment questioning my skills, my worth, and whether or not I'll run out of money before I find a job that's right for me.

Feces occurs, I suppose.

hello again

2008-07-18T17:21:00.002-06:00

It has been a very very long time...

Not that anyone has missed me, but it has been.

A quick update for y'all. I'm unemployed. Lost my job due to "walking out" on the job. Another editor told me to "get the fuck out" so I did. Not sure how following directions and/or being treated like shit gets me fired, but whatever. Some pretty unprofessional behavior on their part (and depending on your perspective, mine too.) Shit happens, It's behind me now, and I'm not going to worry about it. I wasn't going to stay that much longer anyway -- just not a good working environment.

So now my days are spent applying to jobs...going to the gym...playing xbox...looking for more jobs...watching food network, etc.

That's where we sit now. Currently frustrated and fighting depress, you know, the unusual. I'm sorting through business ideas and opportunities and trying to keep life in some semblance of order.

More later.

Rock...Chalk....You're an idiot, Kansas

2008-04-08T10:00:00.004-06:00

I'll admit it, I was rooting for Bill Self and his boys. Why? Not really sure. Maybe because this website I'm working on has some video clips with Bill Self in them. Other than that, I'm really not sure.

I've got a friend or two who went to Kansas, but that didn't really influence my rooting preferences. Let it be known here, however, that I had to try incredibly hard just to root for someone. I abhor college basketball. It's so amazingly boring.

In any event I'd just like to say: Rock, Chalk, Jayhawk? Really? That's it? That's the best you could do? Leave it to the fkn idiots in Kansas to come up with something as insanely stupid as "Rock Chalk Jayhawk."

Months ago a friend from Kansas excitedly regaled me with the tale of how "RCJ" came to be, with all the exuberance expected if we'd just landed on Mars. Apparently "Chalk" is a "Rock" prevalent in the ground of Kansas, and Jayhawk is of course the KU mascot.

Really Kansas? This is what you did? You were so excited to find not one but TWO!!! words that rhymed with Jayhawk you just had to make that your school chant?

Fucking morons.

Apparently the chant used to be "Rah Rah Jayhawk," according to Wikipedia, but an English professor suggested it be changed to "Rock Chalk Jayhawk."

Holy christ I've just discovered proof of evolution, albeit reverse evolution. You people in Kansas managed to make a bad cheer worse! You're all idiots.

Look, I've come up with some other fantastic cheers in the spirit of "Rock Chalk Jayhawk!"

*ahem*

Tree Pine BlackBears!
Mountains Rocky Pioneers!
Rafts Cubans Miami!
Mediocre Banal IUP!

Fkn Kansas. You're a bunch of idiots.

Denver Open Media MIxers

2008-04-04T22:42:00.002-06:00

To the DOM Community CD Swappers: Thanks!

Thanks for grabbing my mix tonight, April 4. An additional thank you for leaving your mix.

Some I've enjoyed thus far, some I've wondered what in the hell you were smoking when you made it -- but such is the beauty of mixing. Some of us mix sounds and burn it, some of us mix music, and burn it, some of us simply mix different songs on a disc, and burn that. Whatever it may be, we're entitled to our own delicious art.

Some notes about my mix: Yes it's mainstream-y. It's supposed to be that way. I wasn't feeling organic when I made it, so I stuck to things that were produced and quite literally ready to rock.

It starts heavy, slows a touch, gets bigger again then just sort of pulls you in a wagon slowly down a snow-covered road to the end -- soft and leisurely. I hope you find it enjoyable.

One last thanks for stopping by my blog. Digg it, stumble it, whatever you can do is appreciated. Read some posts and see what you think, it's just a little place I call cyber-home. Feel free to also check out an art-rambling blog about my new journey as an artists at justaddjason.wordpress.com.

Comments and emails are always appreciated.

Oh, and just in case all the track info doesn't come through, I've listed it here:

1. Slow Suicide by JamisonParker
2. The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows by Brand New
3. Sore Thumb by The Format
4. Come Pick Me Up by Ryan Adams
5. 0% Interest by Jason Mraz
6. So Much Trouble by Matt Pond PA
7. When I Get Home You're So Dead by Mayday Parade
8. Let's Get Fucked Up and Die by Motion City Soundtrack
9. Simple Song by Rustic Overtones
10. Left and Leaving by The Weakerthans
11. Brothers on a Hotel Bed by Death Cab for Cutie
12. Untitled 3 by Sigur Ros
13. The Trapeze Swinger by Iron and Wine
14. Jesus on the Radio by Guster

And I guess if you have no idea what I'm talking about but read this post anyway -- put this mix together, and tell me what you think. Email your comments to the email address listed in my blog profile.

best,

~J

Mom can be so cute

2008-04-02T11:04:00.003-06:00

It's funny how some parents can easily get disconnected from advances in technology. The most troubling digital divide (I like to incorrectly think) is not necessarily a have and a have not between rich and poor, but an understanding and a complete lack thereof between the young and old.

My dad understands email, my dad understands sharing pictures, but the ideas behind web2.0 and social networking techniques and motivations (that surround things like del.icio.us, digg, blogs, flock, writewith, reddit, technorati and all sorts of other social networking platforms) he doesn't quite get. To him, I'm pretty sure it's all just some sort of creepy avenue to cybersex.

But I consider his advances a success.

Mom on the other hand....

Mom hasn't used a computer in ages. It's not wholly her fault, there are some extenuating circumstances that preclude her headlong exploration of computers and the 'net. But one thing I'd think she'd be able to grasp would be voicemail. She gets the concept of email -- for a while she used the local public library to say hi and tell me what the cats did that day. And the day before. And the day before that. And what she thought they might do the following day.

But she doesn't get voicemail.

I have an iPhone. Trying to explain to her what it can do, was a formidable and ultimately futile challenge. I tried to explain visual voicemail, and what that means. All she understands is that one can leave a message. Unfortunately in her technologically immature mind, she sees voicemail on a cell phone as pretty much the same as an answering machine.

This means that every voicemail I get from mom goes just like this: "Hello....Hi. Hello? You there? It's me...your mom. Anyway...."

Anyone who has a cell phone understands that you can't even pick up the phone once the call goes to voicemail, let alone being able to hear the message as it's being left.

But alas, such are the consequences of the parental digital divide.

Oh mom. I still love ya.

It's been a while...

2008-03-31T14:56:00.002-06:00

Sorry folks, it's been a while. Been doing the vacation/back to work/back to school thing. Once the schedule gets to where I can plan/understand what's happening all the time -- we'll be good. Keep an eye out for new posts.

In the meantime, feel free to follow on twitter: JinDenver.

Posts coming soon, I promise!

Thanks A Lot Ohio!

2008-03-04T19:32:00.006-07:00

Fucking flatlanders. The only thing you're good for is Roller Coasters, hell and even then most of your damn thrill rides were designed by foreign companies.

I know it's early...7:33 Mountain Time as I type these words. There's still time, but given the early results it's hard to see a big turn.

Jesus fuck, you stupid idiots from Ohio. I understand where you're coming from, really, I do. I'm from Maine. We're poor, NAFTA hurt us too, but honestly, you think Clinton is th fix to this? The bun to the hotdog in the most divisive Democratic family since the Jesus's's (What's that? Not their last name? Fuck you.) gets your vote? How in the hell did you fall for that stupid NAFTA commercial bullshit? Her husband passed NAFTA (the single most damaging trade bill in American History)!!!!!!!!!! SHE LOVES IT!!!! My lord you fuckers are idiots.

There's no check mark next to Hilldawg yet on that CNN screen cap, but c'mon -- that's a pretty solid indicator (I pray to all things holy that I'm wrong and tomorrow morning I have to put some crow in the toaster)

Sorry for the profanity. Actually, no, I'm not. I'm pissed. I should be reading right now, instead I'm drinking a beer and trying to think of something worse to call Ohioans than Midwesterners but I can't. Being from the Midwest is insult enough.

Look, I've got nothing against HRC, I don't. I think she's smart, competent...looks really owns the room when she wears a nice pantsuit... But she's less progressive than Richard Nixon. How is it you idiots in the middle of the country don't understand the progressive revolution -- you know, the one where we make sure everyone has the right to medical care, everyone has the right to an education, everyone has the right to stay safe from your dumb fuck neighbor's guns, everyone has the right to enjoy clean water/air/hiking trails/wildlife refuges (not to mention the animals!) and an assload of other things that are good for America...

You're as bad as Republicans. I wonder if Canada wants to buy you. Asshats. You go to the polls, vote for Hillary, and help to prolong this race? You know what's more important than which individual takes the White House this year? Which Party Does. This election is more important than Hillary or Obama. Fact is, Hillary's easier to beat than Obama is. She's more divisive and is able to split Democrats themselves, whereas Obama is able to not only get Democrats, but also Independents and Republicans(!!!!!) to vote for him.

You, Ohio, may have singlehandedly fucked us. Hillary may still be kept from obtaining the nomination, but your delegates may cause this race to go on much longer than it should, further dividing America.

You, Ohio, may have singlehandedly ruined the future of my kids (holy shit I wish I could say I was kidding.) If McCain wins this thing, we're asking for more wars! We're asking for more terrorist attacks! We're asking for terrible impressions of him on SNL!

You, Ohio, may have fucked this up. I swear to god, if you did, right after I come ride your excellent roller coasters one more time, I'm going to shit on your entire state. Just gonna drop a great big Wendy's influenced deuce all over it.

Fuckers.

I hope I'm wrong.

Whoa! Beer's empty! lolrz rotfl!!!!

~J

Personal rant...

2008-02-27T08:37:00.006-07:00

Time for a personal rant:

I'm in a class at the University of Denver. It's a distance learning style class where, through the partnership of a certain television company that broadcasts the most riveting entertainment the House of Representatives and Senate have to offer, my class gets to chat with many high profile, important, and experienced guests about the political landscape. This proves especially fun with the B.H.O. v. H.R.C. war currently on.

We have an exam coming up. Our professor teaches class from Washington, DC -- so we never see him, and expect that when papers are due we will print them or have them written on the exam itself or whatever, so that we may fed-ex them to him for quick and easy grading (apparently he doesn't like to print things off himself, even if it is 15 people in class.)

I digress.

We get an email two days before the exam from the TA (this is not her fault in any way, she was just the messenger) letting us know that we had to buy a blue book for our test and that they were available in the bookstore.

In my head the conversation proceeds something like this:

Wait. What? Say that again?
I said you have to buy your own blue book.
We do?
Yes.
Our own blue books...what we'll be writing our test in, we have to buy it ourselves?
Yes.
From the bookstore?
Yes.
I'm sorry, I'm still a little behind here -- Let me get this straight. We're taking a test, we have to write our tests down for the professor, and he mandates that we purchase our own blue book for the test?
Yes.
Stop saying yes.
No.
Thank you.

I don't understand how this makes sense. Why is my notebook not good enough? Perhaps you could go the short route of letting us use our computers for superior typing speed and therefore exam quality (theoretically) but no. We have to write it on a bluebook. That's fine. Until I find we're to purchase them ourselves. I'm not worried about the cost, I have a full-time job so I make enough to afford the $10 or whatever ridiculous cost the University of Denver bookstore dares to charge for these things, it's just the principle.

If you're going to force us to hand write a test, you should not have the audacity to then expect us to buy something additional on which to write our test!!! You want me to write it? Perfect. I'll use my notebook. That's not what you want? Tough shit. Do I get to mandate which format can be used for class communications? I don't except email communications, I have to be overnighted all class related communication from the professor. What's that? Email is most convenient for you and everyone else in the class? SO IS YOU BUYING THE BLUE BOOKS FOR US LIKE MOST REGULAR COLLEGES!

It's a ridiculous pain in my ass to leave my full-time job 20 minutes earlier in the day to make sure I can stop by the bookstore and pay some a king's ransom for a bluebook.

I've recently been informed that this happens a lot in undergrad. All I can say is you idiots went to the wrong schools, this shit should never happen. It's asinine, ridiculous, insane, and pointless. I can't think of a single good reason why this would be beneficial to the class.

In fact nobody can. And if they think they can find a good reason for forcing us to purchase our own blue books, they're wrong and their idea is dumb. That's it. End of story.

J-Wall out.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

2008-02-21T09:49:00.001-07:00

this blog is a repost of mine from my blog for my networked journalism class

Finally! Someone as crazy as Jason Leopold seems to be.

Stick with it until the end. Or walk away while it's loading, and then cut straight to near the end.

WTF?!?!?! Whiskey...Tango...Foxtrot.

I've just signed up for www.myspace.com/firebilloreilly....soon that'll be off the ground to gain legions of fans!

Riddle me this, how does Kelly Tilghman get suspended for two weeks from the Golf Channel for suggesting that his rivals "lynch" Tiger woods in a back alley, yet Bill O'Reilly says he personally wants to lynch Michelle Obama and nothing happens?! Granted this was recent -- but how is he not on his ass fired already? You have to be kidding me. I'm against political correctness in most circumstances, I think people need to have tougher skin and should learn to laugh more, but I don't understand this double standard. Plus he's talking about

killing the wife of a candidate for the President of the United States.

Let's not be unclear about this. While there aren't many people (myself included) who believe that he would actually commit murder (if for no other reason than they wouldn't let him have a radio show in prison) this is an actual threatening statement. The Tilghman incident was clearly in jest, but this is at the opposite end of the spectrum.

Bill O'Reilly should be fired ANY day now. The fact that Fox "News" allows this to happen is incredibly inappropriate.

It's times like this when I'm glad we have things like the blogosphere and networked journalism -- hopefully NOBODY lets Bill-O escape this one.

~J

Libel is as libel does

2008-02-20T17:19:00.003-07:00

Over at my blog for class, the class on networked journalism, we were recently given some assignments for reading. That link has the exact blog entry.

Upon the issuing of the assignments, two of them about Jason Leopold who happens to be a former journalist who used to uphold the tenets of journalism and report stories, emailed our professor accusing her of libel. See his emails here.

Really? Honestly? By asking us to read about his fuck-ups and subsequent refusal to admit he fucked up, our professor commits libel? Asking us to read the truth about what happened is libel? By understanding that he's a liar parading as a journalist is libel? Honestly the only thing separating him from Matt Drudge at this point is his own website complete with shitty HTML. Oh wait.

I can't wait until nobody reads your website, Jason Leopold. You have the gall to email my professor and accuse her of libeling you? You lied, and fabricated sources in a piece for Salon.com, almost completely made up a piece for Truthout.org, and had the publication of your own memoir canceled because of concerns over....care to guess? Lying! That's right! We have a winner!

Douche. Terd Sandwich. Toolbag.

That's right, I'm name-calling. It's not libel, it's opinion! Prove my opinion wrong, I dare ya!

Or maybe he'll just make up some fake sources, emails, and quotes about me.

~J

Pssst, Pass it on!

2008-02-05T13:37:00.001-07:00

This just in, Mike Huckabee won (surprisingly) a few states today during Super(duper) Tuesday. Many now consider him back in the race.

Therefore, Hucka is the new Hella.

As in: That is HuckaSweet. That movie was HuckaAwesome. That girls breaststs are HuckaTasty. You get the drift.

Pass it on!

~J

A big eff you to Coors Light

2008-02-01T09:47:00.002-07:00

So I made the below video with my cousin to enter a contest for tickets to the 2009 Superbowl. Well, despite the fact that it's head and shoulders above any video on the Coors Light site that was chosen as a finalist, I'm quite bitter. All the videos they chose sucked, ours required hard work, devotion, creativity, originality, and plus we're just fun.

No, we're awesome. But Coors Light chose to ignore our video and go a different route. So I'll never drink Coors original or Coors light again unless I'm on their brewery tour. Fkrs.

Below is our video. It's excellent.

~J

On a Chilly Denver Morn

2008-01-23T10:33:00.002-07:00

Just a couple awesome things that are really fucking pissing me off lately.

First: Fuck you, CNN. Again. I've done it before, and I'll do it again. Seriously, Heath Ledger is your lead? Really? It's 9:45 in the morning right now in Colorado, and your lead story is about Heath Ledger? Couldn't be bothered to put up the story about the 935 false and misleading statements made by the Bush Administration about the war in Iraq? Couldn't bother to lead with an article about the debt crisis (and how it was the banking industry, credit card companies, and predatory lending that REALLY put us here?) I understand the concept of if it bleeds it leads, and you want eyes because eyes on your pages mean more sponsor dollars.

But really. Go fuck yourselves. Profanity never makes a great argument, but your bullshit never makes great news either. This is worse than yellow journalism. It's distracting, misleading, and it shows just how willing (lest we forget able, and eager) you are to abdicate your responsibility to inform the public. This is not news. Heath Ledger is a tragic story, but by putting it up front you are saying that is the most important thing right now. Fuck you. Fuck you, twice. And then there's a story about some robbers in Australia who robbed a restaurant. They meant to grab a bag of cash but instead grabbed a bag of "bread rolls." Here's the thing -- doesn't this fit your criteria for a top news story CNN? Robbery, Fun Accent, Guns, Someone Gets Shot In The Ass, and a funny happy ending. I'm surprised you haven't linked it to to the Heath Ledger article yet, after all he was an Aussie...and the robbery happened in Australia...and given all your foreign relations "street cred" in closing down bureaus and sending people to do foreign reporting less and less every year, I'm surprised you don't just automatically think they're related.

I fucking hate you. You're still better than Fox News, but you're a fucking piece of shit. I could continue on CNN, I'm not going to. I need to get back to work soon.

Second: This whole credit crunch shit, and recession fears and all sorts of things. I have my doubts that it's actually real. The credit crunch is, but the stock market falling and all sorts of other bullshit -- all that's predicated upon is fear that consumers are really going to stop spending. We're spending because shit costs too much. Unfettered capitalism, and a free market society create a financial situation that's only good for business. Then there's a collapse, and consumers get blamed. Really? We get blamed for what someone else has done? Let's take a look at this for a second. You know what has really created this? Credit Cards and predatory lending. Republicans especially love to make laws that help these fuckers out. And in the mid 80s with the Reagan administration and trickle-down economics and supply side economics, the flames of the problem were only given more fuel.

When people don't spend, the economy gets hurt. So the idea was that people could be given credit cards to spend, and the economy would do better -- but that's a hollow solution. There's no real liquid, fluid currency processed in a credit card transaction so merchants get their funds, and the consumer gets its merchandise, but the consumer goes in debt. This only adds up over time, in the end pulling the bulk of the consumers fluid currency out of boosting the economy and placing it into a position where it reduces debt -- that hurts the economy. This housing crunch, and the predatory lending associated with it, does more of the same. Lending institutions want nothing more than to lend you money on great terms, reserve the right to change them on whatever arbitrary standards they want to use, then make boatloads of money off of your increased payments. Of course, they think very little of what happens when the lower-middle-class family they just fucked over actually doesn't have enough money to pay their bills. Stupid fucks. When money is spent paying off credit cards instead of actual purchasing of goods, the economy goes downhill. Credit card companies and predatory lenders have fucked us over.

And if you're one of those morons who *again* places all of the responsibility on the consumer, shut the fuck up. You shouldn't be allowed to breed. Does SOME of the responsibility belong there? Yes. But if you're saying that the individual consumer is at fault, you then by extension of your argument are never allowed to blame society, video games, music, family life, or ANYTHING ELSE for ANY PROBLEM for ANY PERSON EVER. If one person has the responsibility, then that's it, no other thing in society can have any hand in their situation. For instance, Larry Craig really is fucking gay. Pun Intended.

People deserve some of the responsibility, but we need to understand that the tactics and practices of credit card companies, and banking and lending institutions breed this kind of behavior. They encourage people to spend too much, take too much credit, and a society of systematic overindulged consumerism does more to encourage people to live beyond their means. The system is at fault for this one, kids. We're talking illegal in many cases, yet our government doesn't really see fit to do much because of course in their minds if businesses are healthy, then so too will be the people. But as we learned from GM in the 1980s, what's good for GM (and by extension corporate America) is NOT good for the rest of the country.

No this isn't an anti-capitalism rant, it's just a what's pissing me off rant. So don't call me a communist. Actually go ahead and call me a communist, because that's a much more appealing party label than anything party that pretends to have the best interests of America at heart.

Oh yeah, 24 states have primaries or caucuses coming up on Tuesday February, 5th. Don't forget to go vote if you have a primary, or find out where your caucus site and go to caucus. Even these steps are important in making your voice heard.

No matter who you support.

Use Google to find a calendar of all the states and their caucus and primary dates so you can figure out when yours is. Your local state.gov site should have instructions on precincts and where to go for your caucus. If you have a primary, it works just like voting. Find out where your voting location is (based on precinct) and then go cast your vote for who you think should be your party's nomination for President. If you have a caucus then you can find candidate videos on youtube that tell you how to do it. (They're goofy, cheesy, so suspend some disbelief, but they will tell you how to get the job done.) You can also find out on your state sites (or by contacting respective party help-lines that can be found online) where your caucus sites are and ask any questions how it works. Caucuses can take a couple hours or as little as 20 minutes, it all depends on how many people arrive from your precinct, and how much support there is from different candidates. But its important, it should be done.

That's it. J-Wall out.

Vote!

2008-01-07T16:56:00.000-07:00

Happy New Year. We get to vote this year. It'll be like Christmas in November.

Don't let any poll, pundit, talking head, news story, or blog entry tell you who you should vote for or that this race is over. All it takes is 20 minutes every day for a week. Research candidates, go to their websites, their myspace pages, whatever -- and see where they stand. See if you agree. In the amount of time it takes you to eat a bowl of cereal and toast you can figure out if you agree or disagree with a candidate, and see who best represents you.

Despite what the media tells you this is not a circus to be watched, a race to be observed, a game in which you have no hand. This does not take place on a playing field that has nothing to do with you. The field is America, it has everything to do with you. It is not only your privilege but your responsibility to vote, and to cast your say.

Happy New Year, we get to vote this year.

I'll take rational thought with a side of Atheism, please.

2007-11-30T11:15:00.001-07:00

I am incredibly disheartened today. I read an article not long ago about Pope Benedict attacking Atheism as "cruel and unjust"saying that it had led to some of the “greatest forms of cruelty and violations of justice” known to mankind. What? Explain please. (He doesn't,) Perhaps the good Pope forgot that "he who asserts must prove."

I think the very basic aspect of all of this can be boiled down to one single question, especially when he is labeling Atheism as cruel and unjust and saying that it has led to cruelty and violations of justice: When was the last time someone attacked someone else (be that plural or singular) in the name of Atheism? When was the last time it happened in the name of god?

You still want to argue that religion is good for our world? Without religion the twin towers would still be standing (arguably.) Without religion we'd be a whole lot smarter and technologically advanced. We'd be a whole lot more rational, we'd be a whole lot safer. We'd be a whole lot less scared, and a whole lot more responsible for our own lives.

I'm also disheartened that Benedict completely misses the idea behind Atheism. He says that Atheism was created to explain the creation of justice by man since there was no god to do it. False, good sir. Atheism is the rational and logical explanation for the state of the world. No god has provided laws for us (men have, in all cases.)

The Pope said, but “the claim that humanity can and must do what no God actually does or is able to do is both presumptuous and intrinsically false”. Again, false, good sir. It is not intrinsically false to say that humanity must do what no god does. That's like arguing that it is intrinsically false for one teammate to do what another cannot. The Pope's quote above, actually makes no sense at all whatsoever. The more I read it, the less sense it makes.

There are good aspects to religion, and the idea of god. I cannot deny that. But religion openly and actively tries to slow down progress, make people afraid, and control lives. There is also absolutely zero basis to the theory that without faith in god people are "evil" "morally suspect" or "morally corrupt." Those are just blatant falsehoods. I have been an Atheist since I was 12 years old. That is when I reached the age of reason and realized that the idea of god just didn't make any sense whatsoever. I am not morally reprehensible, morally corrupt, unjust, or evil. I am a good, kindhearted person, who believes that helping people is good. The more you help the better life will be in general.

There are some who will argue that those are religious tenets -- with that I cannot necessarily disagree, but it's worth noting that just because it has some good ideas, that does not warrant diving full-on into it.

I'm an Atheist. I have been for a very long time, and I will be for the rest of my life. I don't want to raise children believing in god, but believing in themselves, and being good people. Logically it makes sense. I want to raise them to question things, find their own truths and answers, and never seek the easy way out. And most importantly, never let their search for answers in anything lead them into cruel and unjust areas. I guess that means keeping them away from Pope Benedict.

Fiscally Overreactive

2007-11-13T21:20:00.000-07:00

In more irony news, King Bush and his White Castle (mmmm burgers) have accused the Democratically led Congress of being fiscally irresponsible in their efforts to pass a bill (which he vetoed) that would increase spending on federal education expenses federal healthcare expenses through medicaid and medicare. His beef was a $22 billion increase in the bill over what his budget had laid out over the next 5 years. While Bush is technically correct that paying for those programs would come from the increase of taxes, it's incredibly poignant when we couple his accusation with the knowledge that his 100% unnecessary war has so far cost the nation $1.9 trillion dollars, and with no end in sight, that number is only going to grow. Now, that's $1.9 trillion dollars. Here it is with zeroes: $1,900,000,000.

Additionally, a new report issued says that from 2002-2008 the Iraq and Afghanistan war contain hundreds of hidden costs (two of the most notable: increased healthcare costs for returning veterans [which is another story altogether, given the fact that more are coming back mentally injured, and more are becoming homeless FASTER THAN EVER BEFORE] as well as increased oil prices -- that's right folks, sick of high oil prices? The military uses a lot of it..end the war...watch prices fall,) which end up costing a family of four almost $21,000 over the period of 2002-2008. Now, I don't know about anyone else, but I can't think of a single REGULAR family of four (you know, middle class) that can really afford $21,000 over 6 years (yeah I know it's less than $4k a year.) Honestly, who can afford that? And it's not as if we're spending it for any benefit.

The biggest outcome of this war will be the blowback that my generation and my kids and grandkids generations will have to face, when we help to breed a specific brand of people who hate America at a rate far greater than we've ever seen before. We're asking for destruction with this war, not protection.

Fucking ridiculous. Talk about being fiscally irresponsible. Let's spend money to demolish our country, who's with me?

Anyone?

Anyone...?

Didn't think so. Demand Impeachment Now.

Right To Life....really?

2007-11-12T15:24:00.001-07:00

So I read online that the National Right To Life Committee is going to be endorsing Fred Thompson his race for the Presidency. I just wanted to check to make sure, because I would be completely blown away if a conservative committee/group of any kind had any sort of hypocrisy, but the National Right To Life Committee is virulently anti-war, correct? I mean, they are virulently anti-abortion, but since they are the "right to life" committee, they must be incredibly anti-war too, right?

Right?

Anyone?

~J

It's Like Raaaaaain, On Your Wedding Day

2007-11-08T10:42:00.001-07:00

Isn't it Ironic, don't you think?

Bush recently vetoed a Bill with overwhelming bipartisan support (the bill would be approving lots of water projects to help make our water systems cleaner and safer) saying that it would be too costly and would overtax the army corps of engineers.

So how ironic is it that Bush finds an issue with "overtaxing the army corps of engineers" and the spending of money to approve projects for the country's water systems (another incorrect notion: this bill doesn't approve spending, it only approves projects, further appropriations bills will provide funding) but has absolutely no problem with spending Half A Billion Dollars (at the time of this posting) to finance an unjust, illegal, and useless war? Not to mention the fact that he has no problem with keeping troops in Iraq for longer than ever.

I wish I could say I was more surprised about this, don't you? At least we're getting a veto override out of the deal.

~J

This...this I don't get

2007-11-06T19:07:00.000-07:00

Now, there will be a World Series Experience recap coming soon. I've honestly got notes on the whole experience to make sure there are things I don't forget. Should I figure out how to email cell phone pictures to myself, I'll even upload those so you may bask in the glory that was a Red Sox World Series Championship right here in the place I call home, Denver, Colorado.

But that has to wait for a time when I'm a touch less busy -- and perhaps a touch less ridiculously pissed off.

Dennis Kucinich, bless his heart, soul, and Presidential Run, introduced another bill in an attempt to impeach Viceroy Cheney. But when faced with the prospect of actually having to vote on the bill (Republicans were voting to table the bill, but then suddenly said 'no wait, let's vote on it!' forcing Democrats to actually vote on the resolution thereby indicating their position on impeaching Cheney, Democrats suddenly reduced their challenge to tabling the bill, and it was sent to committee where it is expected to die.

What the fuck? Seriously, What the fuck? Pelosi, as much as great change you were over previous house members, you don't deserve to be reelected. You took office with a promise of impeachment, and have since announced it has been taken off the table. Both of the leaders of the executive branch are guilty of multitudinous offenses punishable by impeachment. They have lied, straight faced over and over and over again to the American people. This fact is not even up for debate, it is straight truth, and I cannot in any way shape or form understand why on Earth Democrats do not support impeachment. It makes absolutely no sense to me. End the war, end the lies, end the corruption which has run COMPLETELY rampant since Bush took office. End the oil prices, end the Republican slowdown of healthcare and education bills that will help millions of Americans (the slowdowns of which are subsequently blamed on Democrats and the media dutifully then reports the Conservative line.) I really don't understand what the big deal is. The majority of Americans disapprove of what this administration has done and continues to do. The majority of Americans understand that we were lied to, and have been treated like children. This administration deserves nothing less than impeachment and I cannot for the life of me understand why it is not being done.

Demand Impeachment Now. There is not a single good reason on the face of this Earth why it should not be done.

Texting Dr. Unk, Texting Dr. Unk...

2007-10-08T13:10:00.000-06:00

It has come to the forefront of my attention that texting, IMing, and even surfing the web while intoxicated may yet be the greatest threat facing our generation.

Look, I know, we've all been there. All you wanted to do was say hi. All you wanted to do was find someone cute to talk to. All you wanted to do was see if she wanted to hang out this weekend.

Dude, you're an idiot. First of all, half of the girls you just IMed, texted, messaged on Match.com and OKCupid aren't even that attractive. You're just so drunk that the lines between fat and ugly, thick and kinda cute, soft and cute, reasonably hot, and smokin' have become inextricably blurred. They are one in the same now. Your attraction checklist looks less like the 12 step program it ought to be and more like the 3 step instructions on the back of a shampoo bottle. 1. Check for Tits 2. Make Sure She's Breathing 3. Figure out her favorite position and find the nearest bathroom.

So why don't you slow your roll, step away from the computer/cell phone and just take it easy. Have some water. Why don't you sit the next couple of plays out. Because you're only going to embarrass yourself and ruin your chance of ever seeing her again. Of course if you don't like her and/or she's fat/ugly then just don't forget to wrap it when she caves and wait until 2am to leave, that's the deepest sleep. What's that? She's coming over your house?

You're a moron. There is no hope for you.

This week in what pisses me off...

2007-10-01T15:32:00.000-06:00

Okay so everyone does things they aren't proud of. I've used match.com. Those aren't necessarily related. While I don't walk around yelling wildly about how I've used Match.com before, I don't exactly shy away from the fact that I have. When asked, I'll admit. Now, I don't really use it anymore, for various reasons I'm quite happy right now in my dating life.

That being said, I randomly got on to my match.com page, I do every now and then, who knows maybe some delicious honey sent me a message. (Though it's more likely that one of those plastic bears full of actual delicious honey will send me a message.) What usually ends up happening is I look to see if I have a message or something, maybe look at the talent to see if anything will wake me up from my relationship hibernation, and when I see that there is not, I close the window and go back to whatever I was doing before. Or watching pornography. Which is often what I was doing before.

Now, on seldom an occasion, I will send a message to someone. Often this happens when I am drunk. It has not happened in a long time, the span of a couple of months, but I will sometimes send a message to a girl who falls into the "below my league" category. I often engage in the self-deprecating practice of finding a girl who will not be so hot as to never talk to me, but in fact be a paper bag short of being able to date anyone. Okay that's harsh, but you get the point. She could be cute if the light was right and she was wearing the right kind of makeup. The Right Kind = Plenty of it.

The most infuriating thing in the world, or maybe just my little world, is when the BMLG (below my league girl) doesn't respond. I sent her a message because it was a sure thing. She's not that attractive, probably more than her fair share of overweight, and is shy. Those girls are easy, especially if you can spit game. I can spit game.

One sends a message (or talks to her in the bar, or sits down next to her at a coffee shop or chats her up at a bookstore) simply because she's a confidence booster. Maybe not exactly a slumpbuster (though depending on where you started talking to her, it's basically a Phil Jackson coached transition away.) Read: Smooth. But the bare bones fact is that she will most likely go out with you, or talk to you, become interested in you (because she's below your level, she knows it, and is surprised a guy like you is attracted to her) and because she is interested in you, you will feel better about yourself.

It's fine, ladies, don't try and say you fuckers don't do the same thing. Anyway, when girls like this don't respond, or don't return messages it's incredibly baffling, infuriating, and against the laws of physics. I believe this is known as Kepler's Second Law of Fat Bitches. How can she possibly not respond? Wait a minute here, Jabba the Hut doesn't find me attractive enough to at least say hi? You're kidding me. Out of all the unattractive women on match to whom I could've sent a message, (there's a formula for that. It's like t=total # of women so T-9=x whereas X equals the total number of unattractive women on the site) I sent it to you, and you actually didn't reply. Unbelievable.

Of course this immediately causes a rash of self-destructive introspective thoughts. They are largely self-destructive simply because they are introspective. Guys, don't do that, seriously. That's an order. So you have to sit back and question why they didn't respond. Am I unattractive? Am I too forward? Do they not like my profile? Are my interests to broad? Are they too specific? Usually before I get too far, I just conclude that because my picture was not a picture of a twinkie bar, or because I failed to mention that I am, in fact, oft-attracted to 5's and 6's that they just don't take me seriously.

I mean, not that this has ever really happened to me before.

Tis The Season

2007-09-13T18:27:00.000-06:00

You know, fall usually brings many wonderful things. The Red Sox settling in for a hard playoff run, the beginning of the football season, and of course Hockey and the Chase for the Nextel Cup.

Sure, for many of us start school again, or those of us with S.A.D. begin drawing up blueprints on the best and safest ways to kill others, but by and large fall brings about the rich and creamy goodness of padded violence, sweaters, falling leaves, and the chance to bag a hot chick as she's hoping against all hope that this isn't the last time she gets to wear something ridiculously slutty in the sun and have it count as normal wear. (Note: It's not. If you live anywhere near a college campus, girls are still "fucking retarded" enough to think that skirts and ugz boots with bugeye sunglasses and some sort of faux-hip jacket qualify as "in" winter-wear.)

But there's something that is really pissing me off. Go ahead, call me a homer, call me blind to the realities of sports, or unable to look at a situation objectively. In true fitzy fashion, I say GFY. That's "Go Fuck Yourself" for those of you unfortunate enough to be familiar with Fitzy. (Hint: www.townienews.com)

Can you be serious though? This much outrage about the Patriots possibly videotaping Jets signals? I mean...honestly? People are going to call for the coach to be suspended? Terrell Davis (former Denver Donkey's RB) says that they should be banned from the playoffs for two years? Some of the Eagles have said that they think the Pats should be forced to forfeit their Superbowl victory and the Eagles should get their rings. Really? Go fuck yourself.

I hate Philadelphia. I've been there once or twice or too many times. It's dirty, it's gross, and it produces the worst sports fans in the world. True, New England fans can be obnoxious, but at least we have a reason for it. And we're still not New York, that waste of a fucking state. Think Mexico would buy it? Anyway, the Eagles are so down on themselves because they cannot produce a team anywhere near championship quality that they have to find something to bring down a team that beat them? Goddammit I hate you Philadelphia. Why do you have to be such a worthless city? Your fucking nickname is "city of brotherly love." What? Not only are you gay, but you condone incest? Holy god I hate Philadelphia. I never ever ever thought Benjamin Franklin was wrong, until I just checked to make sure on Wikipedia that he helped to start the American Revolution there.

Anyway, enough about how shitty Philly is. If you've ever been to Pennsylvania, you know pretty much the entire state sucks. If only charm was toothless...

Of course, objectively one has to be upset at this Pats thing. The absolute hands down best team of the last 6 years was caught cheating. It makes a modicum of sense to assume that they've been doing it a while, but when it comes down to it, taping defensive signals can't make people run faster, jump higher, remember patterns, catch or hold the ball better. There are so many fucking variables in the game, that it's asinine to assume that stealing a couple defensive signals will win a game for you. And it's ALSO asinine to assume that they were able to get all the defensive signals, interpret them all, and then adequately see the signal, call in a change of play, and get the offense to pull of the perfect play around the called defense. It's called Occham's Razor folks, lex parsimonae. The simplest explanation is the truest one. They are just the better team.

Now take off your jealous pants and get ready for another ass-whooping. I hope as they cross the podium and hold the Lombardi Trophy in February, Bill Belichick and Tom Brady both have video cameras.

GFY.

I know nobody reads this...

2007-07-28T12:14:00.000-06:00

I know that nobody reads this thing...

But I just read the most distressing thing on CNN.com. Apparently the United States is working on a $10 billion arms package for Saudi Arabia. What? Excuse me? Do I look like I'm fucking stupid? Does the rest of the country look like they are fucking stupid?

Very quickly, I'd like to say this: 17 of the 19 hijackers on 9/11 were Saudi. Which to me is reason enough not to give those motherfuckers weapons... The reason they were Saudi but joined up with those who like to attack America is because they had firsthand experience with the grubby and greedy hands of American capitalist enterprise trying to weasel their way into controlling Saudi oil interests. THAT'S why they don't like us. Because we put our noses where they don't belong, and try and control things that we have no business controlling. So now we're going to give money to S.A. in an effort to help them fight Iran? You must be fucking stupid. Here's what's going to happen: We're going to make MORE war in the Middle East (which is NEVER GOOD FOR ANYONE) and we're going to give Iran a better case for hating us -- we're helping other people fight them.

I do not hold Iran in high esteem, but I do not hold the Saudi's in high esteem either. Quite simply, the United States is spending ANOTHER $10 billion to directly finance terrorism.

How in the name of all that I find holy (bagels and doughnuts) is this going to Help America? If there was a god, he/she would never let this shit happen.

ESPN -- You suck.

2007-07-19T20:41:00.000-06:00

Dear ESPN:

I want to start with this: I love you. You are the source of so much joy in my life. You allow me to learn so many pointless stats about sports that I don't even like so that I may impress male strangers and force many an attractive woman to roll her eyes at my dorkiness.

I would like to continue with this: You fucking suck. I check your website probably 600 times a day. 650 if it's a slow day at work, and 550 if I found a fun porn site when I got home from work, and every time that I do, I get your sportscenter sound. You know, "da-duh-da, da-duh-da." At first this sound made me smile, I got all happy about getting to hear something new from the sports-world that day. But on these past billion occasions, it has been on your website, with this little banner updating me on Barry Bonds and his chase for the Home Run Record. ESPN, I don't give a shit. ESPN, the majority of America does not give a shit.

Honestly. I feel like the SportsNation polls you put on your website daily should ask this question, "Do you care about the Barry Bonds HomeRun Chase?" Overwhelmingly the nation will answer NO. NO. HELL NO. I WOULD RATHER GO LONG MOONLIT STROLL WITH PARIS HILTON than hear about Barry Bonds. Absolutely disgusting. Nobody cares, stop promoting it. The worst part about it is that the people who DO care, only care because SC pimps it like David Beckham coming to America.

Please. Stop. He used to do Steroids. He's a cheater. Nobody cares.

I would like to close with this: Despite your programming supersaturated with coverage of shitty sports (especially basketball) I still love you. It's just unfortunate that the reporter has become bigger than the game, and their ego shows it. Shame on you ESPN. But I still love you...

This, is Rocky Mountain Golfer.

2007-07-17T22:54:00.000-06:00

So in the spirit of being all high on myself, I've embedded a segment from Rocky Mountain Golfer, the show that I work on. The voice is mine, and the segment I edited a large portion of. Comment if you want, I guess. It is what it is, I just feel like being a showoff.

And just for your internet enjoyment, Rocky Mountain Golfer is a production of SportsHD in Denver, CO. You can find out more at SportsHD.com, as well as Rockymtngolfer.com.

What you think you know often has nothing to do with reality...

2007-07-14T12:13:00.000-06:00

For some DUMBASS reason last night, after getting back from dinner and some bar action, I had a ridic amount of completely horrible dreams. Like...dreams about throwing up, dreams about Paris Hilton trying to have sex with me (directly preceded the throwing up dream, ironically enough.) Umm...I also had a dream about being a celebrity...this kind of goes along with the Paris Hilton thing. I was at a party all cool and hanging out with celebs and people wanted to talk to me...really random.

I guess it has something to do with the fact that I do the voice-over for a show called Rocky Mountain Golfer that airs out here in the west on Fox Sports Rocky Mountain. I just felt really cool, and I really enjoy that what started as an unpaid internship has turned into a full-time job that has some really cool perks, is a lot of fun, and I get to do voice talent stuff. What Mike Rowe is to Deadliest Catch, I am to Rocky Mountain Golfer. Except...not even close to as cool as he.

It's Saturday...and I have to fucking work at the restaurant tonight, and I am PISSED. Cannot fathom (aside from keeping my discount) why in the world I volunteer to give up my Saturday nights. Not only that, but when I originally asked for every other Saturday and they said no, I said I'd do every Saturday as long as they gave me a good shift. So that means a cocktail shift (come late, leave early) Open Dinner (start at 3, out by 9) or a Swing (start at 1, first cut at night around 8) So those shifts let me have some of my night free, while helping me to maximize my time and money. So I call yesterday to find out when indeed I do work, and it turns the fuck out that I had a meeting at 11 (no way in hell I'm attending) and I also have to work at 4:15, so what that means I'm a dinner single. Dinner Singles (only working a single shift all day) is the worst thing to be because you have to stay there forever. I will be there all night, and have no free time this evening. Not that I really had a lot going on, but I am ridiculously protective of my free time.

Okay, enough bitching. Shit has been great lately.

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner.

~J

mmmm clubbin!

2007-06-29T02:21:00.000-06:00

There's nothing like being in a club, being white, with your polo shirt tucked in, not knowing any single song that comes on, but dancing with a ridic hot blonde because you told her you were an astronaut and she bought it like a fkn claiborne blouse on sale at Saks.

That is all.

~J

Part hit, part run...

2007-06-18T09:06:00.000-06:00

Everyone hears about hit and run accidents. They see it on TV, or a friend of a friend of a friend's pool cleaner got involved in a hit and run. Nobody ever thinks it'll happen to them. They happen in Boston or LA or Dallas or the ghetto, they don't happen in Denver.

Si, they do.

In fact they happen in the parking lot at the Bull and Bush right down in Cherry Creek (and apparently semi-frequently.) My dad is out for Father's day, my uncle is as well (since my roommate is my cousin.) So our dads are brothers. They fly out, we're having a fantastic time. Enjoying the weather and the sights and sounds of Denver and meeting people and eating too much food and going to sporting events and the mountains and everything. So we're at the Bull and Bush having dinner and some beers (PHENOMENAL create your own burger section on the menu, by the way,) when the waitress comes out and says, hey do any of you happen to drive a black Ford Focus?

Why yes I do, I say, expecting to hear that I left my lights on, or that she just happens to think people who drive Focuses (foci?) are sexy. Someone just hit your car, she informs me. So I hop up from my seat and speed-exit the patio in order to check things out. I'm fully ready to throw punches at this point.

I get out there, with my crew in tow, turns out someone backed up from a parking spot located behind my car, and to the passenger side, and put their right rear bumper corner into my door, along the entire length of the door. So, I need a new door. Hooray. It could've been worse, nobody was hurt, I wasn't driving it, it's not completely out commission, even if the door doesn't close properly. The waitress comes out and says "I have some good news." Excellent, hopefully they know who it is, and they're holding him in the tap room for me to punch repeatedly. Close. There were two witnesses who saw the whole thing happen and not only got the make of the car, but the license plate as well! Sweet! It was a black Jaguar that hit me, license plate # yada yada yada. Bartender gave me the info, passed from the other patron. Cops come, take statements, license plate does indeed go to a Jaguar, all is well.

So now I just need to get my car in the shop, get things taken care of post haste, and get my car back for next weekend (just in time for more friends to come out and visit all weekend.

This should be an interesting week...

Copyright Infringement

2007-06-07T23:58:00.000-06:00

For the first time in my life, though I'm not sure why that timetable is a surprise to me, I have apparently been accused of copyright infringement. Posted below is a YouTube/Paramount Studios email to me.

"This is to notify you that we have removed or disabled access to the following material as a result of a third-party notification by Paramount Pictures Corporation claiming that this material is infringing:

Anchorman Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-K7eMSu5mic

Please Note: Repeat incidents of copyright infringement will result in the deletion of your account and all videos uploaded to that account. In order to avoid future strikes against your account, please delete any videos to which you do not own the rights, and refrain from uploading additional videos that infringe on the copyrights of others. For more information about YouTube's copyright policy, please read the Copyright Tips guide.

If you elect to send us a counter notice, please go to our Help Center to access the instructions.

Please note that under Section 512(f) of the Copyright Act, any person who knowingly materially misrepresents that material or activity was removed or disabled by mistake or misidentification may be subject to liability.

Sincerely,
YouTube, Inc."

In one of the previous posts on this blog, I made a link to a video on YouTube that was a parody of Anchorman. It was a trailer I created for a graduate class, and was displayed on the web. I am simultaneously proud and pissed off at its removal.

The trailer was created under both educational fair use, and fair use for parody. It was a non-profit creation, and was displayed on the web to illustrate educational achievement. But apparently Paramount Studios disagreed with me, and chose to force YouTube to remove my trailer.

It's a form of educational free speech, and a form of parody. Parody in that I made fun of the character of Ron Burgundy in the movie, and worked to illustrate him as a character of deep emotion while still inept at love -- which is similar to the way he was truly portrayed in the movie, but I did it in a different way.

So despite that my trailer was legally made, and posted under the auspices of legal use, Paramount had an issue with it. I feel ridiculously excited to fight this, and to see what Paramount thinks they can do to me. I'm not rich, I'm not a genius, and I'm not some superstar artist, but I'm willing to fight, even if it's minor. And this could be very fun.

Stay tuned.

15 Minute Performance

2007-06-05T17:25:00.000-06:00

This video, albeit long, is something I'm actually rather proud of. The more I watch it, the more I find to like about it. The third and final project (after a live in-class performance that was not recorded) for my Digital Cinema Theory class, this 15 minute piece is made up of videos from other projects, as well as videos that I simply felt fit the music. The music is a combination of three songs by an Icelandic band called Sigur Ros. The First song is Untitled 4 off the album (), the second song is called Avalon, and the third song is called Untitled 3 also off the album, (). Please watch the video, then read my synopsis below.

The idea behind this video was to overcome my previous inability to get a message across by honing my skills and making images more clear. While there are a lot of muddled images where it's difficult to tell what's going on, when that happens that's kind of the point. The ones you see clearly, are the ones I want you to see clearly. Given the fact that this is constructed of three different songs, there are three distinct movements to the piece, and there is also a bit of storytelling as the work goes on. The first movement has music that is happy, but careful, and by the end turns downright wistful and sad. We are carried through the second movement by a more somber and dangerous sounding track and we get to a part where the video shows us war, bombs exploding, and a president making a speech. Without being too much of an overt political statement (I never show the actual face of the man in the foreground) the viwer can infer that something is going desperately wrong with the happiness that occurred in the first act. The second act ends with shots of a space shuttle flying away, presumably to another planet or another place -- the act matters little, it's the metaphor of escape and departure from the previous movement that is the most important. The third and final act of the piece returns to a happy state and employs much of the same imagery of the first act while still remaining unique.

Feel free to comment.

:-)

Timeline VJ Performance

2007-06-05T16:52:00.000-06:00

For this project, the second in a series of three video pieces for my Digital Cinema class, I used both Sony Vegas and Resolume to create a timeline based digital video remix to sound. My attempt was to send certain messages by the visual imagery in the piece, but I ran into a problem where, quite simply, I had too much to say for the digital video vocabulary I posessed to be able to say anything effectively. It comes out repetitive, dull, and pedantic in a way that seems like I tried to hard but looks as if I didn't try at all. All video, images, and audio are used under Educational Fair Use, and the song is Canon in D (strings) by Johann Pachelbel.

The music serves as an antithetic to the reactions the visual imagery suggests, it also happens to be one of my favorite classical songs.

It moves way too fast, and the audio editing is horrible. If you promise never to watch this again, so will I.

Trailer Remix

2007-06-05T16:44:00.000-06:00

This video is a remix of the movie Anchorman starring Will Ferrell, in a way to construct a trailer that makes it...well...dramatic and hilarious at the same time. It was the first project I did in my Digital Cinema Theory class, and was probably the most fun to create given the material I used. Sony Vegas, Final Cut Pro, and a host of decrypting programs were used to construct the video. The song used is a cover of Jeff Buckley's Hallelujah, as sung by Rufus Wainright. All video and audio are used under freedom of parody and educational fair use.

It's a decent trailer, I suppose. After watching it many times I came to the conclusion that there would be some things I would do differently, but it serves it's purpose. Enjoy, comment if you like.

It's the pleats.

lips

2007-06-02T20:16:00.000-06:00

Honestly, who sunburns their lips?
Seriously, do you see that? How gross is that? It got all cracked and peeled and it hurts to eat because my lips have to stretch to open because I am completely American and can't eat portions that fit normally inside my mouth.

Er, new blog. I'm cool.

Here is a robot rabbit who hangs on to your cursor. You will spend at least 45 seconds playing with this before you realize how dumb it is.